Ask Chuka

  The sweet benefits of loyalty remind me that the worst thing that can happen to anybody is to be destitute of sincere friendship . Without loyalty and true friendship, life becomes cold and lonely. George Kaitholi once said, “A friend is someone who knows you all through, yet loves you all the more.” This is the truest picture of loyalty in friendship. In my own case, I discovered this when I met Barnabbas Dogara, my first driver. The day he resumed, pot belly and all, I joked, “I hope when we go about our business, people won’t think that you are the boss.” That was the beginning of a relationship that would move far beyond a job description. I gave him principles that mattered to me: don’t be late, don’t steal, respect my family, ask if you need anything, and stay focused on your work. Barnabbas lived by those values and soon proved that loyalty and integrity were his real job description. Before long, I noticed bills paid, groceries sorted, sports runs for my kids done, all wi...

Your little gifts today may be the open doors tomorrow. My friend Musa was in my office when I got an invitation to our mutual friend Paul’s birthday party. The invite clearly stated: “Access card valid for one person only.” For over an hour, Musa quietly waited for his own IV, until he finally asked: “Paul never send my own IV oh, abi him no want make I come?” Awkward moment. Weeks earlier, Paul had told me he wanted the party to be very exclusive. When I checked his guest list, Musa’s name was missing. I assumed it was a mistake, so I asked Paul. Smiling, Paul explained: “I don’t want people who never hold parties and never bring presents. They are always the first to arrive and the first to leave, with nothing in their hands.” Let me not lie, he hyped me small. He said he couldn’t remember me ever attending his house or events without a gift, even if it was something little from Jewel Publishers (like mugs, t-shirts, sports jerseys) or gadgets from Jewel Multiservices (like laptop...

  Do we truly value things until we’ve carried the burden ourselves? When my son Papi turned 10, I decided it was time to add washing his football boots and socks to his chores. Not just his own, but also those of his two younger brothers. One evening after training, I asked him to soak all the socks and then wash them. As he struggled through it, I quietly smiled, knowing he was learning something deeper than just doing chores. A few moments later, his younger brother Domba strolled out with no slippers on, just socks. Immediately, Papi shouted, “Haba, Domba! How can you walk around in only socks? Is it because you’re not the one washing them? Daddy, warn him oh, otherwise he’ll wash them himself!” I burst into laughter because it reminded me of when I used to complain, “Why are you walking around in socks without shoes?” Papi would just say sorry, and sometimes even do it again. But now, because he is responsible for washing them, he insists no one should walk around the house in...

What if money isn’t the best thing someone could ever give you? They called the gate of the temple Beautiful. It was there that Emmanuel (not real name), a man lame from birth, was dropped daily to beg. Perhaps it was called “Beautiful” because kind people passed by, often generous enough to give him something. For years, this man never went anywhere else, he grew comfortable with his lifestyle of begging. One day, however, everything changed. Peter and John, unlike others, had no money to offer. Instead, they told him: “In the name of Jesus, get up and walk.” Instantly, he was healed and there was no record of him ever returning to his old trade. Reading this from Acts 3 today reminded me of Cosmas Maduka ’s words: “If all a rich man gives you is his money, he has cheated you.” Too often, when we meet wealthy or influential people, we only want money, forgetting that a connection, a referral, or even a miracle could be far greater than money. My prayer for you and me is this: may we m...

  Do you always have to say what you know? In the Bible in One Year by Nicky and Pippa Gumbel, I came across something striking from Proverbs 12:23: “Fools blurt out folly, but a prudent person is reluctant to display knowledge.” Their commentary added, “Knowledge is like underwear, it is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off!” Back in my undergraduate days, I was obsessed with philosophy. In 100 level, not a day passed without me sitting in the library, devouring ethics and epistemology texts. I could proudly say I had gathered some knowledge. Then came a literature class where the lecturer tried to analyse a book using one of those ethical doctrines. But much of her explanation didn’t align with what I had studied deeply. Instead of keeping quiet like everyone else, folly whispered, “Don’t let your mates learn the wrong thing, stand up and correct her.” And so, I did. I explained the origin of the concept, its proponents, its application, and then asked whether she ...

Can you really keep a secret once it leaves your lips? A few years ago, a close friend of mine was fired from his job over financial misappropriation, something our firm does not tolerate. Because he had served diligently, management recalled the dismissal letter and allowed him to tender a resignation instead. (Those in HR will understand the difference.) Since he was one of the most popular staff members and close to me, colleagues kept asking about him when he suddenly stopped showing up for two weeks. Under pressure, I let slip that he had been fired, not knowing the official story was that he resigned. That was enough for the office rumour mill to catch fire. Staff began digging for details, and when they finally pieced it together, my words confirmed the truth. Some reached out to him with sympathy. Others confronted him harshly, asking why he would ever stoop to behaviour “expected only from criminals.” He didn’t bother verifying the source. He simply called me, blasted me, warn...

  What if everything you’ve worked for suddenly became meaningless? A few months ago, I read about an African politician whose only son died. To this day, the man has not recovered from the shock. It was alleged that this 76-year-old politician looted his country during his time in office, opened foreign bank accounts, and did little or nothing to develop the constituency he served. Many wondered why he was so intent on amassing wealth when it was almost certain he would not live another 20 years. Some speculated that he was building wealth for his only son’s future children. But when that son died, people said it seemed as though his entire world collapsed. Without an heir, all the looting suddenly made no sense. The Bible describes such a man as the “Rich Fool”. His harvest was so great that year that he tore down his barns to build bigger ones, saying to himself, “Relax, my soul, and be merry, for there is more than enough to last a lifetime.” But he did not know that his life w...

  Every time I’ve read those words, first from Scripture, and then echoed in one of Bob Marley’s reggae lines, “Blessed is the hand that giveth than the one that taketh”, I thought it was simply about giving money or meeting someone’s financial needs. But today, my understanding expanded. The truth is, no one is so poor that they have nothing to give. In a commentary I listened to, the speaker began by saying, “If you’re broke or barely scraping by, those words might not make sense.” But the deeper meaning is not just about money, it’s about seeing the world as a place where you add value instead of merely extracting it. It’s about asking in every situation: Not just “What can I get?” but “What can I give?” This mindset changes the way we work and live: At work, It’s no longer just about clocking in, but about making the place better: mentoring others, making someone’s job easier. In family, Choosing to keep the joy in the room alive, not focusing the light on ourselves alone. In f...

  Something I read this morning reminded me of my time working under one of the best bosses I’ve ever had, Mr Abu Ugbede, when I served as a Supply Chain Data Officer. 😲 I was genuinely surprised that someone would prefer a spreadsheet to a database management system built with Excel. When he resumed as Head of the Supply Chain Unit that year, he carried out a thorough audit of how our department functioned and the tools we used. He then told me he wanted us to use Microsoft Excel to track health commodities at the warehouse. I tried to justify my existing system, including highlighting the risk of errors with spreadsheets, but he stood his ground, maybe because I didn’t follow his instructions. I kept saying, “But this system I’m currently using provides all the data and indicators you need.” Still, he insisted on Excel. I disagreed, and refused. In plain terms, I was being insubordinate. Unfortunately, one of the privileges of adulthood is that nobody can flog you when you err. ...

Image Credit : Facebook While discussing life over shawarma at a restaurant, I didn't realise my friend was quietly listening to "My World" by Lucky Dube playing softly in the background. Suddenly, he asked, "If given the choice right now to be a child or an adult, which would you choose?" I laughed and quickly replied I'd choose adulthood, after all, adulthood represents freedom. Children are bound by rules, burdened with endless errands, and given only a small piece of meat during meals, or at least that's how it was when I was growing up. As I enthusiastically listed adulthood's perks, like independence, making money, and enjoying certain privileges, I noticed my friend wasn't as thrilled as I was. Curious, I asked why he had posed the question. It turned out he had just managed to pay his children's school fees moments before their exams began, narrowly avoiding a situation where the school would prevent them from sitting exams until fees...