Ask Chuka

In my discourse yesterday 👉🏾 https://www.askchuka.com/2026/03/blog-post.html  I reflected on why the growing idea of “𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙞𝙨 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙬𝙚 𝙙𝙤 𝙞𝙩 𝙣𝙤𝙬” can be problematic. I also promised to explain why, especially in a world that constantly tells us to 𝗠𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗢𝗡, while wisdom quietly reminds us to 𝗟𝗢𝗢𝗞 𝗕𝗔𝗖𝗞. Let me tell you a short story. One day, my son began bleeding profusely from his nose, and we rushed him to a hospital in Abuja (𝙣𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙝𝙚𝙡𝙙 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙄 𝙧𝙚𝙥𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙩𝙤 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙝𝙤𝙨𝙥𝙞𝙩𝙖𝙡’𝙨 𝙈𝘿). In the past, I had some minor concerns about a few of their diagnoses, although my wife preferred the hospital, perhaps because of the environment. So this time, I armed myself with a medical application on my phone to validate some of the diagnoses the doctors might give. Unfortunately, my concerns proved valid. A young doctor suggested that the bleeding might be related to a Vitamin K deficiency and propos...

My friend told me recently that their new employee resigned after her probationary period was extended because of her performance. HR had a conversation with her and pointed out areas where she needed improvement. She was given a one-month extension to work on those areas, but instead of taking the opportunity to grow, she chose to resign. A few days earlier, I also spoke with my mentor. He struggled to relax during our conversation because he had just come out of an argument with a Gen Z employee regarding expectations on a task he had been assigned. These days, you hear many stories about what it is like working with Gen Z. It often feels as though a new generation is trying to redefine how work, commitment and responsibility should look in this era. The challenge is that everywhere you turn, someone is saying, “Things are no longer done that way.” The message seems simple: accept the new way things are done or insist on your values even if you have to stand alone. To be honest, I ha...

  If it were good for man to be alone, God would never have created the woman. But He thought differently. He created a help meet , suitable, strong, intentional. And if you truly understand what it means to receive help, you will understand the significance of women in the development of humanity and the advancement of our world. As much as I am a man who believes in uplifting men, I cannot recount a single season of my life when I was not helped by a woman. The first woman I knew was my mother. Without my knowledge, and with God’s help, she carried me into this world. She nurtured me. She walked me to school. She taught me my first words and my first songs. She held me when I lost my father. And when it was time for me to build my own family, she was strong enough to let me go,  to love another woman. How do I recount the blessings of marrying my wife? Yes, marriage comes with challenges. But it also comes with partnership, counsel, strength, and unseen sacrifices that hold ...

About three weeks ago, I became tired of constantly searching for pencils and pens whenever I wanted to study with my children. It felt like a small issue, but it was costing us time, money and discipline. So I stopped tolerating it. I drove to Jewel Multiservices at Area 1 and bought pencils, pens, erasers, rulers and a proper stationery container. I placed it close to the dining area where we study. Then I gave clear instructions: Every item taken must be returned immediately after use. Replacements will only happen when the ink finishes or the pencil lead is exhausted. If I check and anything is missing, everyone answers. Day one: a pen and pencil were missing. Blame game started. Eventually, they were found and returned. Day two: same thing. Day three and four: nothing missing. It has now been three weeks. Only one pencil is gone, the lead finished. One pen is missing, perhaps a visitor who did not know our rule. Inspection changed behaviour. A few days ago, while reviewing why sa...

 We had the privilege of printing the T-shirts and brochure for the Service of Songs held in honour of Ifunanya Nwangene , a prolific young soloist whose life was cut short following an unfortunate snake-bite incident . Since her passing, the internet has been abuzz. In my opinion, this is not merely because of the tragic incident itself, but because Ifunanya lived a phenomenal life , however short it may seem. Many people have passed following snake bites without drawing the attention of their communities, let alone the media. Others have lived such unimpactful lives that the world silently wished they had come and gone unnoticed. But Ifunanya’s life was different. Her presence mattered. Her voice counted. Her impact lingered. The Bible says in Psalm 90:12 : “Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” No one knows when life will end, but Ifunanya’s passing, despite her young age, reminded me of two profound truths: 1. LIVE PURPOSEFULLY If the purpose of a t...

  When we go to the hospital, we do not ask about the tribe or religion of the doctors, nurses, or other health practitioners before receiving the care we need. When we go to the market to buy our daily needs, we do not concern ourselves with the tribe or religion of the sellers. We simply get what we need and move on. When we rent houses or attend schools, we rarely pause to consider the tribe or religion of others. What remains stunning, however, is that during elections, politicians suddenly remind us of our differences in tribe and religion, using them as distractions from the things that collectively benefit us: healthcare, infrastructure, education, security, and good governance. Today at Mass, the Church marked Interfaith Week. The service was beautiful and deeply moving. Three Imams visited our parish and stayed through the Holy Mass. They were given the opportunity to address us as brethren, different in faith, yet united in many core beliefs: 𝐁𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐟 𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐆𝐨...

A few years ago, some of my friends got into trouble while trying to defend themselves from a man who attempted to bully them. Because they were more in number, they subdued him and left that evening. The following day, the police arrested all of them and accused them of assault. Every apology they offered fell on deaf ears. The man simply could not believe that people as young as they looked could overpower him in any way. They called me to intervene when he insisted on pressing charges. As I listened, I noticed his real problem. Over and over again he kept saying, “Do you know how old I am? And you had the effrontery to do what you did? I swear you will not get away with this.” When he finally finished and turned to me, expecting whatever argument he thought I would make as their “elder brother”, I did something unexpected. I went down on my knees. I did not mind that I was dressed in crystal-white attire. I simply knelt and tried to say, “Please forgive us.” Before I could finish my...

  King Musko had a clever jester whom he considered to be a very yeye person (𝑨𝒔𝒌 𝒂 𝑵𝒊𝒈𝒆𝒓𝒊𝒂𝒏 𝒐𝒓 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒕𝒈𝒑𝒕 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒆𝒚𝒆 𝒎𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒔 😊). One day, the king summoned him, handed him a staff in front of everyone, and said, “Take this staff and keep it with you as the most yeye person in my kingdom, until you find someone more yeye than yourself.” Months later, the king fell seriously ill and became convinced he would not survive, even though friends tried to comfort him with false hope. Knowing that his jester always spoke the truth, he summoned him and said he was going on a very long journey and might never return. Curious, the jester asked, “My king, do you have friends or anyone to welcome you when you arrive there?” The king answered, “No.” “What preparations have you made for the journey?” the jester asked again. “Nothing,” the king replied. The jester smiled wryly and handed the staff back to the king. “When you gave me this staff as the most yeye person i...

  One of the saddest feelings I carry about 2025 is that my friend, Michaela Moye, popularly known as Mickey, passed on before the year ended. If you are reading this, I am glad you made it. Even so, with every part of me, I wish Mickey had made it too. But I am not the author and finisher of life, and my capacity for some things is limited. Mickey was a good person. By human standards, she truly was. She was educated, honest in her dealings, vocal about the things she believed, and never ashamed to share her struggles until the very end. I am grateful that I reached out to her after she posted on Facebook about how weak she felt and how difficult it had become for her to stand due to a shortage of blood in her system. I could only reach out because she shared her struggle openly. That openness gave room for concern, connection, and help. Eventually, a nurse was by her bedside, along with someone she had called and waited hours for to come and assist her. Sadly, those interventions...